Highlights and documents I have written

The Six Best Sex Positions

(Plus, Introducing the Amazing Cosmo Butterfly) by Kristen Kemp, with additional reporting by Danielle Epstein Copyright © 1999. All Rights Reserved. Reprinted by permission from Cosmopolitan (April 1999).

"I love my fiancé, Tim, with all my heart, but he wasn't setting any records for long-lasting lovemaking," says Tina Noble^*, a 24-year-old television producer in Los Angeles. "Sometimes he'd come after just a few thrusts." The couple tried out many make-it-last maneuvers - double-bagging with two condoms to desensitize his penis, pulling out to take boink breaks - but nothing held off his climaxes.

Noble had resigned herself to a lifetime of blink-and-it's-over intercourse when a friend suggested they try a side-by-side sex shimmy that draws out below-the-belt excitement. And whoa baby, did it work! "Doing it in this position delayed his orgasm," she says. "It was by far the most satisfying sexual experience we had ever shared. Now we do it that way all the time!"

Even if you aren't in such a pesky passion predicament, you too can enhance your ecstasy by taking a new look at nooky. Here, Cosmo comes to the rut-busting, body-rocking rescue with six positions that fulfill particular sexual missions.

And as if that weren't enough to make you want to rip off your clothes, wait till you try the Butterfly - a brand-new bonus position guaranteed to give lovemaking new meaning. So what are you waiting for? Grab your man as fast as you can and put these pleasure positions to the test.

YOU ON TOP: Control Your O

"Sometimes, I just want to be the chick in charge," says Micki Taylor, a 28-year-old musician in Los Angeles. The perfect position when you're feeling extra energetic is woman-on-top. And no sane man is going to gripe about being put in his place. "My husband loves to lie back and watch me make love my way," Taylor adds.

When you take the role of Big-O CEO, it's up to you to decide whether you want to have an orgasm via your clitoris or G-spot - both are possible in this position. For the can't-miss clitoral orgasm, lean your torso forward, arch your back, and keep your crotch close to the base of his penis. Try using a rocking motion to maneuver his manhood instead of ride-'em-cowboy body bucking. You should feel the firmness of his pubic bone pressing right against your big-O button. And don't be afraid to pull him upright into your arms for a special heart-to-heart moment.

You can also detonate a G-spot sexplosion by leaning back and resting your weight on your hands while riding up and down on his penis. "It may take a little practice, but this on-top technique is a good way to trigger an internal full-body G-spot orgasm," says Lou Paget, author of How to Be a Great Lover (Broadway Books, 1999).

Bonus turn-on tip: Another impress-him maneuver is to grip his penis and do a pelvic bump'n' grind. "I swivel my hips with his penis deep inside me," says Samantha Bower, 26, a choreographer in Boston. "Once I establish a rhythm, I start squeezing my pelvic-floor muscles strategically - guys go nuts when I do that." So crazy she says, that they'll do anything to drive her equally wild with lust. To find your love muscles, stop the flow of urine and notice which muscles flex. Do several sets of 10 hold-and-release contractions of these muscles throughout the day and, in a few weeks, you, too, will be able to give him a lap dance like none other.

YOU SITTING, HIM STANDING: Johnny Come Quickly

Let's face it, you're not always in the mood for languid, last-forever lovin'. Sometimes, you're so horny that you just want to get to the orgasm already. "We'll be out to dinner and get so turned on that we're dying to go home and do it," says Alison MacKinley, 25, a grad student in Champagne, Illinois. "We barely make it through our front door before we're going at it on the narrow hallway table."

Doing it on a countertop - you're spread-eagled on a table while your man faces you to thrust from the front - creates megaheat in a minimal amount of time. He's sure to come quickly because he plunges deep, says Anne Hooper, author of The Great Sex Guide (DK Publishing, 1999). "Plus, men get off on the novelty of doing it somewhere new - to them, out of the bedroom equals no-holds-barred sex," she adds.

YOU UNDER HIM: Chicken Soup of the Sack

Most couples' main sex selection is the man-on-top missionary position. Often this oldie-but-goodie gets a "been there, done that" bum rap. Yet, there's a reason why Tara Rowalski, 25, a teacher in New York City, craves it often. "I just need to feel close to my boyfriend," she says. "I get a special connected feeling when our bodies are pressed together; it's a safe and loving pleasure position." Think of it as the comfort food of the bedroom.

And there's a reason it feels so effortless. "Our bodies just fit well that way," says Hooper. Other physical rewards to this coupling classic: nonstop kissing, touching, and eye-gazing. "It's like a whole body massage - inside and out," explains Hooper. "I love to feel every inch of my girlfriend's body," says Thomas Golan, a 23-year-old sound technician in Chicago. "I can feel everything from her neck to her breasts to her toes - it's extremely erotic."

And don't mistake: Just because the missionary is ordinary doesn't mean that it can't be extraordinary. Put some swivel in your hips as he plunges in and out. "That way you can be an active participant, taking sexual control of your vaginal sensations while you're on the bottom instead of just receiving what he gives," she says.

The downside of the missionary: Some women have trouble climaxing because the clitoris just doesn't get hit in the tried-and-true fit. Which brings us to...

CAT POSITION: The Soft Rock

Okay, so missionary doesn't always make you quake. But a non-acrobatic modified version can give you the romantic connection while delivering an amazing orgasm (really). "I read about a variation on the missionary position and had to try it," explains Elena Davids, a 23-year-old undergraduate in Chapel Hill, North Carolina. "It's a slow burn, but by letting our pleasure build gradually, we have orgasms that are more intense and intimate than ever."

The magic making-it method is called the coital alignment technique. "It's simple," says Edward Eichel, author of The Perfect Fit (Signet, 1993). "The man slides two to four inches forward from the typical missionary position," he explains. "Rather than resting on his elbows, his arms should cup your shoulders so his body falls flat against yours," Eichel says. "Both of your spines should be straight." And the base of his penis should naturally rub your clitoris.

The next step to coital climax involves some genital soft rock. "Your legs should be straight out and touching his while you push your pelvis upward about two inches," Eichel explains. "He should push down gently to give a slight counter-resistance. There is no in-and-out - it's an up-and-down rocking movement." But since both sets of genitals are sharing such tight quarters, it's extremely pleasurable for both of you. To bring him in deeper, spread your inner thighs even wider and wrap your ankles gently around his calves.

DOGGY STYLE: G-Spot Jiggy

"Once you have an earth-shattering, total-body G-spot orgasm, you'll crave more," says Dallas Fenway, 26, an office manager in Hartford, Connecticut. "I can find my hot button by myself when masturbating, but reaching it through intercourse is the sexual crème de la crème."

Okay. You've probably heard of the G-spot but might not know what it is, where it is, or how to get at it. "Your G-spot is a quarter-size supersensitive area behind the front wall of your vagina, about one-half to two-thirds of the way in," says Barbara Keesling, Ph.D., author of Super Sexual Orgasm (HarperCollins, 1997). And a little firm, well-placed stroking of this pleasure place can open up a whole new orgasmic world.

But not just any position will do the G-spot job: For his penis to hit your hidden hot spot, your vagina has to be precisely angled. And doggy-style penetration fits the hit-the-spot bill perfectly, as Fenway can attest. "I can only have those great, all-body G-spot orgasms from the doggy position...so I like to do it a lot," she says.

Nor is this a ho-hum pose for your man. "My lover loves going so deep inside me and the way his testicles hit my buttocks," says Fenway. Plus, there's something very primal about banging from behind that brings out the animal in even the most mild-mannered guy.

If you haven't discovered your G-spot (keep looking!) or if you're a big fan of clitoral tingles, coax his fingers to do some walking. "Your lover can easily rub your clitoris while he's thrusting," Keesling encourages. He can also caress the nape of your neck, your breasts, or wherever else you like."

Brian Hackney, a 27-year-old investment banker in Toronto, has his own variation. "I had always loved doing it doggy-style, but it didn't do much for my girlfriend - so I bought a vibrating sex toy," he says. "It's really easy for me to use on her clitoris in this position."

SIDE BY SIDE: Now and Zen

Your man doesn't have to be a two-minute Tim to make you want to extend your body-bonding bliss. When on the brink of the Big O, going side-to-side, face-to-face is a surefire pleasure-prolonging pose. "My boyfriend and I use this between our other super-arousing positions," says Helen Gary, 28, a waitress in Cheyenne, Wyoming. "We bring ourselves to the edge of orgasm, come down a little in the side-to-side, then slowly build ourselves back up to an even more incredible climax."

Consider it a horny holding pattern. "There's not a whole lot of motion - that's why it delays climax," says author Paget. But it's perfect for erotic embraces and intimate eye contact. "A couple can feel very close when they're facing each other in this position," agrees Nitya Lacroix, author of The Art of Tantric Sex (DK Publishing, 1997). It's this kind of incredible emotional ecstasy that makes you laugh, cry, and come all at the same time.

To up the intensity, get into a gentle pelvic rhythm (so he doesn't go soft on you) and look into each other's eyes while taking natural, deep breaths.

COSMO INTRODUCES: The Amazing Butterfly

When you're in the mood for quality, because-you're-worth-it climaxing, bust out our brand-new Butterfly - named for unequaled ecstasy without high-energy commitment.

The key to taking wing with our revolutionary position is lining up correctly with your man: Find a place - maybe your bed (if it's a high one) or a desk, counter, or even the hood of a car - where your pelvis is about one foot lower than his. Lie back while your guy stands in front of you. (Tip: He might be able to kneel if your bed is superlow.) Then lift your legs and rest your feet on his shoulders. Now, throw in the Cosmo Superlift: Tilt your pelvis upward so that your back forms a straight line angling up toward him and your crotches meet. Put his hands just under your hips so he can hold your booty at the perfect angle while he thrusts (and you don't have to worry about flexing your abs to keep things inline). Why does this feel so great? "The pelvic tilt gives his penis better access to your G-spot and builds in more friction for both of you," says Joan Elizabeth Lloyd, author of Now and Forever - Let's Make Love (Warner Books, 1997).

The rest is herstory: "I had an outstanding out-of-this-world orgasm," says a fun, fearless Cosmo staffer who bravely tried out the Butterfly. "We used lots of lube and went nice and slow. He hit my G-spot while I gave myself an incredible clitoral rubdown." She adds that her boyfriend liked it not only because of the deep penile penetration but also because it made him feel mega-macho. "He literally had me screaming with ecstasy, which makes every man feel like a stud," she says.

Hooper is another Butterfly fan. "This position can be intensely romantic," she explains. "When done very slowly, it's completely dreamlike." The result? An orgasm that takes fantasy-worthy flight.

SIZZLING SEX SAMPLER

Stuck in a one-note nooky rut? Here, mix-and-match lovemaking menus to satisfy your every carnal craving.

Stoke Your Love Fire: Renew your wows with these heart-to-heart dishes.

1. Appetizer: You Under Him (Chicken Soup of the Sack). Get head-to-toe in touch with each other.
2. Main Course: Side by Side (Now and Zen). Enjoy intense eye contact and blissful body rubbing.
3. Dessert: Cosmo Butterfly. Just when you thought you couldn't fall any more deeply...you do.

Make It a Kinky Lite Night: Feed your hunger for over-the-edge ecstasy.

1. Appetizer: You on Top (Control Your O). Start things off right with a twist-and-shout bout.
2. Main Course: Doggy Style (G-Spot Jiggy). Let your bad girl come through and feel so-o-o good.
3. Dessert: You Sitting, Him Standing (Johnny Come Quickly). Blow him away with a built-for-him bang.

Quench a Doing-It Drought: Release your pent-up passion by taking fast action.

1. Appetizer: You Sitting, Him Standing (Johnny Come Quickly). Bring him over the brink in a blink.
2. Main Course: You on Top (Control Your O). Unleash your frustrated lust.
3. Dessert: CAT Position (The Soft Rock). Have a sweet, slow, simultaneous second coming.